I’ve been thinking. I mostly like my life here in Spokane.
I am kind of disappointed in myself for not seeing through Sam’s bullshit shenanigans. but my dad had just left for arizona. so I was sad and needed to be diverted… I’ve been questioning my judgment – there was the roommate drama at the old house. I trusted those gals and thought we were friends and that they wouldn’t treat me like shit. oops! then there’s Sam. I did not see the anger stuff coming. or the stalking me at my americorps graduation and chatting up my mother. !!! the sooner I never see him again, the better.
my job has more or less ended. I might volunteer for the newspaper, but my hours are complete and I will get my final paycheck monday! woot!
I got my final timesheet signed. woot. I will take it over to the americorps office and my dear buddy Steve will so my exit paperwork. then, I should be able to be entered into the program, the new one.
I’m switching from Americorps state/national (which pays $1050 per month) to Americorps VISTA, which pays $833? a month. I don’t think I’ll be paying off al ot of bills this year like I hoped. but I went int thinking “any port in a storm” and “this is a great organization and it’s worth a pay cut to work there” and “I’m giving the economy 10 months to recover enough for me to get a job in a non-profit.”
yes, friends. voluntary poverty. I wouldn’t say I’m poor – because I have a master’s degree and I was raised in a middle class environment and I have lovely pasty white skin. and nice teeth (a la braces) but I’m not going to have a lot of cash this year, trufax.
I actually had a really nice conversation with my boss last night. as an exit interview goes, it was pretty chill. we were at her house, in her home office. we talked about projects I succeeded on this year. things which were coming up for the organization. she needs more infrastructure. which is to say, she absolutely cannot do it all by herself. and none of her kids has the journalistic passion, skills, or desire to take over her business. which is kind of sad. I would hate to see the newspaper die. it does need to change some, but I would hate to see it die.
I do (and told her so) admire her for having found her vocation, stuck with it. I admire her because she found work she loves to do, created a niche and stuck with it… she does something she loves to do, every day. she has a whole body of life’s work, in the library! it’s pretty amazing. (but too many of her articles sound the same, I think. I think she would do well to have a challenge, a different perspective.) I would love to write a blog for the Fig Tree website. hell, I might even get some readers.
I feel so absent-minded vocationally that I just don’t know what to do with myself. I still wonder if I should be a minister – but without christianity? how can a person be a minister without religion? (and if you say UU – there’s been enough drama in the local UU church I’ve been taking a badly needed break.)
so. yeah. thinky-thoughts.
I have a job starting Tuesday! I should probably go somewhere this weekend to get away….
but I think I will clean my house, practice guitar, move the nordic track out of my car and into the exercise room ( I’m looking at you, please…)
and maybe gasp! vacuum. the house needs it. and the house needs to be de-cluttered. I clutter everything when things get stressful or when transitions happen.
so yeah. (I watched Friday Night Lights season three last night. it’s kind of nice that Tim Riggins is growing up, eh?)
happy saturday flisties! I hope it’s all that you need it to be.